December 29, 2010

• Christmas has come and gone, along with my excuses not to post.

  
  illustration by coco for Balenciaga

  I thought starting with a new blog would be simpler - that I'd be as excited to post as I was when I started my first one. Then, I couldn't get up early enough to get my thoughts down. I had to stop myself from posting twice or three times a day. 

  But I was different then, too. 

  I didn't know yet that my blog life and my real life would eventually align - I'd be hampered by the same need for control. I had started my blog as a way to escape my self-imposed constraints only to find myself as cautious as ever. Don't post anything you can't take back. We are who we are, I guess. But it does become exhausting to keep silent in two forums. Maybe that's why I love my tumblr so much. I can holler out my truths and desires and failures and they are still - mostly - my own.

  So here I am again, determined to keep writing. I will tip-tap-type my way out of the relapse of obsessions that tie my tongue and learn how to deflect with a little grace.

  g.

   

   

  • 8:44 am
  • 2 Comments